Learning from experience......

My grandfather he told me when I was very young

Don’t take advice from the educated ones

Just ignore the teachers they always think they  know what’s best

But they’re using  common sense that’s uncommon from the rest of us for….

 Learning from experience it's the only way to learn

Stick your finger in the fire and watch the blighter burn

Fill your mouth up with candy floss and watch your teeth drop out

Cause learning from experience that's what  it's all about.

Off on your holidays

You’re getting in the mood

Tenty pints of lager you go swimming in the nude

Your bits and your tackle flying all about

Then you get back to work and the photos all come out.

You're  at the supermarket on a trolley dash

At the check out counter you’re running out of cash

the check out girl is looking bored

You cannot find your credit card

and there's twenty coloured condoms with the vicar at your back!

for in years to come you'll realize mistakes will clearly show

There’ll be little old ladies with perky boobs, Old men with pyjama tubes

And no one will remember what the blasted things are for!

I’ll tell you now in honesty there’s very fine line

Between a life time hobby and mental illness

Obsessions that you regret like your vast collection of beer mats,

Rubber ducks and care bears, tight lurex underwear 

Your old display of bathroom plugs, Princess Margaret’s novelty jugs

That politically incorrect collection of the Rowentrees gollywog badge selection …..These are the ones you wished you missed when taliking to your therapist..cuckoo.